Mi famiglia

Tacy is in the bathroom with the door ajar. I peek in and see pebbles on the floor. She follows my gaze. T (outraged): I don’t know how those got there! Someone put rocks in my pants! —————————— I’ve picked up the girls from school, and Tacy is telling me about the plans she has…Read More

What not to write

Toward the end of “The Catcher in the Rye”, Holden goes to spend the night with a former teacher of his (Mr. Antolini), and they talk about Holden’s troubles at Pencey – the school from which he was just expelled. Specifically, Holden cites a class he took in “Oral Expression” in which the students were instructed to give speeches…Read More

That’s what friends are for

I met Stacey in the summer of 2002 on Babycenter. She posted on the Working Moms message board as well as the Atheist/Agnostic board. Not only are her posts pants-wettingly funny – her comments on children’s television programs are legendary – but she is also articulate, intelligent, and extremely well-informed. When my PIMs took our…Read More

Sweet Tasty Freedom

Many people bemoan the lack of personal freedom after having kids. These people usually don’t have kids. These people also enjoy things like pooping without an audience. But see, having kids made me free to poop with an audience. Granted, that event is an invite-only soiree that can be attended only by people (and animals)…Read More

Staph meeting

Is it Sunday night ALREADY? This weekend was a staph-infected blur. I’m pretty sure it was staph. As in Staphylococcus aureus. As in “oh my god I think I’m going to DIE” repeated ad nauseum (quite literally) for a good twelve hours. I had a cheesesteak for lunch Friday. Half a cheesesteak. The other half…Read More