Leave my house , for the first time in two years, daughter crying passing her off to my husband. Crying, crying, breathe, relax, feeling good. Feeling guilty, Daddy is home, children must depend on someone else to care, provide, give, not me, guilt. Breathe
No Dora music on the way to work, turn on my tunes. Turn Dora on again for a few seconds, then turn my music on. Thinking to self, didn’t tell daddy to turn pot handles in, or to put frozen peas in M’s soup to cool it off. Did not tell daddy to make sure N blows his nose in tissue not sleeve. Make sure to give medicine! Breathe
Work, relax job to do. Work hard, do tasks. Call daddy- everything is great. What, kids should be crying, running around yelling tearing stuff off the walls- demanding and getting sugar, candy. Feeling a little jealous. Keep working enjoy the peace. Not making millions, just helping people out who need a hand. Helping out at home with the money I make. Providing a little more. Last hour, could this clock move any slower?
Driving home, can I get home any quicker, police escort? Pull into driveway, sit in the car one more second, listen, peace. Breathe. Walk into house, smiling faces, questions, hugs and kisses. Best feeling EVER!
5 responses so far ↓
Summer // July 25, 2008 at 8:34 am |
I bet those hugs and kisses upon coming home were wonderful.
Mama C-ta // July 25, 2008 at 8:38 am |
I imagine there are a lot of feelings and emotions involved when returning to work outside the home and that peace and satisfaction are understandably some of those.
Deanna // July 25, 2008 at 8:47 am |
I am going back to work in September. I’m trying not to think about it. I’m interested to see how it goes from here for you!
Rachel // July 26, 2008 at 2:06 pm |
YAY! glas everything worked out on your fis=rst day back:)
Mel // July 26, 2008 at 4:18 pm |
Wow…I feel like I went with you. Every year when I go back to work after summer vacation I feel the same way. It has gotten easier over the years especially since my son now comes to school with me, but still hard. I have always felt that I am a better mom since I work because I feel like I treasure our time together. I know I won’t see them during the day so I try to cram as much time in at night to make up for it. I love being a working mom. I hope it works out for you too.